Challenge Me

oldmecombined

The Facebook Challenge: Post your first and most recent profile pictures. Write a letter to your past self- how much has changed since then??

Dear Me,

You are 17 and the worse has yet to happen. Cherish your grandmother, she will not always be around. Every opportunity you have to be selfless and do something for her, do it.

I know you’re preoccupied with the idea of getting married to your first boyfriend and getting away from your mother. Breaking up with Tyler is not the end of the world, he is NOT worth the suicidal feelings that will cross your mind. Someday, you won’t even talk to or think of him for months. Someone else is going to come along and love you much deeper, in a much more intimate and erotic way. 

You’ll have bumps, and the second you see that idiot at the poetry reading, walk away. Don’t do it. Your grandma is dead and no longer there to guide you, otherwise she’d tell you how you’re wasting your time on that alcoholic who can never truly love you. You thought it was making you deeper, suffering for love. You thought you would be strong enough to bear it~ yea, but at what cost???

Elizabeth will move away from you. Is it a good thing that you let her? You didn’t try to make her stay, didn’t realize how permanent it would be/feel. You won’t speak ever again, all because of one man’s jealousy and how she doesn’t play into your life. She chose her wandering life, and she has to live it. You’re staying behind, and why spare the time to think on things that never can succeed? She makes you uncomfortable now. It’s unthinkable, but someone who was once so close to you, now makes you squirm with dread when you know she is coming home. It’s because you know she thinks it’s your fault, all the times you couldn’t meet her when she was in town. All the secrecy, trying not to let Jake get jealous. She thinks it’s my fault, but she’s the one that moved away.

Since then, some things never change. You can see in the background that 9 years later, I’m still as lazy and messy as fuck!! The first background has shit all over the floor, and now it’s my desk that looks like a tornado hit it. You can see in the first background that I liked hotels, and here I am, working where I always wanted. Professionally, I have set a good pace and I am a valuable employee. In a short while, I acquired management experience and am only inches from my ultimate goal, a front office manager. I wear suits, and I smooth over angry guests. Strange, but a passion for writing still lingers in your breast. Don’t let it go.

oldme3

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